27.8.07


|WEEKEND|

|CHALLENGE|ADVENTURE|EXCITEMENT|SPENDING|FUN|LAUGHS| |ARGUMENTS|DEPRESSION|RECOVERY|CALM|


Mum and Dad got back from their holiday earlier...I'm really pleased they went. It's the first time they've had the chance to go away together since their Honeymoon!

It was a challenge too for my sister and I to run the family business without them, but the two of us, along with some help from our cousin bro and sis managed it well I think.
It was actually quite easy to do, and I feel I can do it again in future, hopefully for longer next time.


My cousins came up on Friday and left this afternoon.
As usual in their company, we all had a really good time, laughing, joking, spending...


See the post below for all the treats I purchased (with money I don't actually have! :-S )

My sister saw this jacket she really liked in Cult but she seemed doubtful when she asked my opinion so I advised her to make sure she really liked it and ensure it wasn't just an impulse buy.
She decided to reserve it and come back later.

After a few more hours of shopping the stores began to close, and she had to rush back to Cult, and plead with the sales assistant to let her in to buy it.
That situation showed her that she really did want the jacket.

Sunday was good, because all four of us bought stuff that we really, really liked.

I felt a bit down after the two of them left, even though I was excited that the 'rents were coming home, I had that "Sunday evening" feeling of everything going back to normal, a new week ahead, and the end of a really good weekend that I'd been looking forward to.

It didn't help that I kind of had an argument with my...friend.

They told me that they'd been asked out on a date, two in fact.

And I didn't take it so well, because, to be honest, we were once more than friends, and I'm not sure how I feel now.
My reaction proved to me what I thought, that I do still have feelings for them.
It's like the jacket thing again.

And the frustrating thing is maybe things could have worked out, but there was so much miscommunication when we 'talked' and I don't know if we understood each other.
It's my own fault anyway.

The truth is I was a little scared...because suddenly something that I'd been longing for, and then an virtual relationship suddenly became a real person.

I've never been in a situation like that.

It was exciting, but it was also a little fast...to be that close mentally, having only met once.

Like I said, it's my own fault.
I can't expect them to deal with that, or wait for me.
And as I told them, I am happy for them. I really am. They deserve to be happy. Because they're an amazing person.

It's just that I'm tired of being the person who's happy for everyone else.
I want to be happy myself. As selfish as it may sound.

I've waited so long, how long more do I have to wait?

Ah well, everything happens for a reason, and people come into your life for a reason.
Sometimes it's obvious why.

Sometimes it's not.
Sometimes it's to give you a message. To restore your faith.
And sometimes you just don't know why.

But hopefully they'll stay around long enough for you to find out.

:-)

Night lovelies. Xx


2 comments:

Anyhoo said...

Are we talking mid-June here, just prior to going to the Summer Exhibition? Your initial reaction then, as you relayed it, was based on lack of sparks. It doesn't matter how much effort you put into whatever comes next, or how you plan things out for yourself, no spark equals no go. I think you like this person, and would like to like like them, but it's not quite there, hence the dismay when not-there-yet is demonstrated to be there-will-be-no-there by the other party's dating. I should end in some platitude about there being plenty more fish in the sea, but you'll probably only point to the failure of the EU quota system to protect stocks.

Azuric said...

No we aren't...we're talking August. And a different person.

But some of what you said applies.